


tasting your sunsets

by taemintylips



Category: Monsta X (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Teenagers, Basically just life, Growing Up Together, M/M, its kinda messy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-05
Updated: 2018-03-05
Packaged: 2019-03-27 12:22:32
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,810
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13880787
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/taemintylips/pseuds/taemintylips
Summary: Years passed by in the form of too-short jeans and ratty t-shirts, until they outgrew everything except each other.orThe process of learning to love as children, teenagers, and confused adults.





	tasting your sunsets

**Author's Note:**

> INTERNATIONAL DISGRACE HERE AT UR SERVICE  
> its almost three am and theres design class tmr rip me  
> enjoy?  
> (long ass a/n below)

 

Minhyuk had always been the curious one. His questions started long before Hyungwon met him, and were just as relentless after that. Hyungwon gave him answers, or tried to sate him with his own grey in-betweens.

They had a lot of those at the age of seven.

       

“Where does the sun go at night?”

“I dunno. But it always comes back. Look, over there.”

 

Those memories were a blur of saturated colors. Bare toes pushed into freshly mown grass, chasing each other in poor shade under the neighborhood trees, and cheap popsicles grasped by grubby fingers, always half melted and dripping.

Sunrises and sunsets. Clouds and rain. Autumn and winter birthdays. Bicycles and swings. Nasty falls and scrapes. Tears and innocent laughter.

 

Being with Minhyuk, Hyungwon thinks, was like trying to hold those popsicles. He never managed a clean hold, instead always getting it all over his fingers. Hyungwon never liked how the sticky sweetness would threaten to fall from his grasp. It felt like sunlight dripping from his hands. He wanted to cup it with his palms, but failed every time.

 

 /

 

And as the summer heat simmered down into pleasant autumns, plowing onto dreamy winters, birthday cakes each year gained the weight of a single flickering candle, waiting to be blown out by two puffs of wind.

 

Minhyuk grew, but Hyungwon grew taller.

They laughed whenever one’s voice would break, about how Hyungwon outgrew yet another pair of jeans, about how Minhyuk’s first dye job literally fried his whole scalp.

Minhyuk remembers Hyungwon’s exposed ankles, facial features no longer softened by baby fat, and his sleepy gaze framed by long bangs. He always reminded Minhyuk of drowsy afternoons, laziness creeping up their sleeves and pulling at weary eyelids. He was a silent force that kept Minhyuk gravitated to his orbit, lying by Hyungwon’s side content just to count his steady breaths.

 

Years passed by in the form of too-short jeans and ratty t-shirts, until they outgrew everything except each other.

 

 /

 

Of course it would be Minhyuk. After all, Hyungwon was used to his endless inquires.

 

“I really like you. Not just as friends, I mean.”

“I know.”

“Is that weird?”

 

Hyungwon’s answer was a kiss like a gentle sunrise, hesitant but with solid warmth, steadying a wavering heartbeat. When he pulled back, Minhyuk’s eyes were shimmering with unshed words.

       

Minhyuk, with his stupid blond dye and black roots poking out, with his adorable uneven blink, with the late summer breeze nipping at his bare feet in the grass. Minhyuk, looking so vulnerable and unsure of himself, fingers playing with the frayed ends of his jacket, with remnants of the sunset dusting his cheeks.

 

Lee Minhyuk, with a stupid question and a fluttering heart; the answer to his own question, Hyungwon’s answer to everything.

 

 

Sometimes Minhyuk needed a little reassurance from Hyungwon. A subtle brush against Minhyuk’s slender fingers, some late night cuddling, and morning kisses pressed to sleepy pouts. Even during sweltering summers, when the air conditioning broke and their only source of cool air was an old fan creaking from the ceiling, Minhyuk would always tangle their lanky limbs together regardless of Hyungwon’s weak protests about the heat.

In the end, Hyungwon always let him. His answer would always be yes.

 

 

Mornings were not Hyungwon’s favorite, but when sunlight filtered through lopsided shutters, draping over the boy softly snoring in his embrace like a shimmering veil, he was certain of one thing.

That home was not only this small sleepy town he had spent most of his life in; home was a person, and that person was Lee Minhyuk.

 

So when Minhyuk told him that he wanted to leave, Hyungwon was ready to give up their old sunsets in exchange for new horizons.

 

 

 /

 

 

The number of ratty jackets and ripped jeans in their closets gradually shrank, making way for awkward shirts and crisp slacks that now became their armor against the world. Unlike Hyungwon whose shoulders filled out his shirts well, Minhyuk never felt comfortable in his dress clothes.

 

If growing up meant that he needed to master close-lipped smiles and restrained laughter, then he would rather be back home, sitting under what scattered shade the tree in their front yard could provide, in his faded hoodie with a yawning Hyungwon by his side.

He was content with their secluded sunrises and sunsets.

 

They had less of those after they left their small town. Instead of rosy dawns peeking from behind glassy skyscrapers, they had more quiet nights on their balcony with stars reflected in their eyes.

Minhyuk missed the warm kiss of sun against his skin. But when he saw Hyungwon struggling to keep awake beneath the inky sky, moonlight caressing his face and illuminating his glasses, Minhyuk couldn’t help but reach out and pull Hyungwon towards him.

“Hey, sleeping beauty.”

“Mhm?”

 “Time for bed.”

Minhyuk received a lethargic smile and a mumble of confirmation before Hyungwon wrapped his arms around his waist.

It was times like these that Minhyuk loved the night more than the day. Kisses softer than starlight, as sleepy as the moon. Wide grins that showed his silver tooth. Gentle fingers sifting through bleach-burned locks.

Moonlight is just sunlight reflected, Minhyuk reminded himself.

 

 

 /

 

 

Hyungwon always knew before Minhyuk was about to launch into another round of questions.

 

_“Will you still love me, one year later, when you find that not all my smiles are sincere and most are a façade only you can see through?”_

 

Hyungwon learned that Minhyuk had a plethora of smiles reserved for different situations and people. Wide and gummy, showing off his large front teeth. Weary but sincere. Cheeky and playful. Poorly disguised grimaces. Sad and wavering. Smiles that didn’t reach his eyes. Close-lipped and curt.

His favorites were those saved for his eyes only, even if it meant a small watery smile after hours of sniffling into his shoulder. Minhyuk was a walking paradox, a combination of sunshine and cumulonimbus clouds, a haphazard storm drenching Hyungwon’s sleeves with a downpour of emotions.

But to Hyungwon, Lee Minhyuk was nothing but breathtaking. Crystalline tears of homesickness cresting over sun-kissed cheeks and pale fingers clutching onto Hyungwon as if he were his lifeline were nothing short of beauty, albeit tinged with sadness. Hyungwon tried to clear Minhyuk’s skies for him when his sunlight couldn’t shine through. He knew that Minhyuk missed lazy afternoons and cracked sidewalks and parched grass between his toes and endless sunny skies.

He saw through the front Minhyuk put up to keep his dam of emotions intact, and gently broke through it like waves lapping at shore.

If he were to drown, this was the way to go.

 

_“Of course. I’m the only one that can do that.”_

/

 

_What about five years later, when you find that I’m a mess and throw my clothes everywhere, never really learned how to clean up after myself, and wake up with the shittiest temper?”_

 

They fought. Over trivialities like groceries, laundry, or just about how someone’s phone kept ringing.

Hyungwon tended to keep his anger in check, bottling it all up until he would snap at Minhyuk, who would retaliate with twice the venom. They weren’t terribly fussy about whether their apartment was squeaky clean, but Minhyuk’s temper ran short under stress.

“Chae Hyungwon, I swear to god if I see another piece of clothing on the floor I am going to fucking lose it I can’t even walk without tripping every step.”

“If you did your own laundry once in a while you’d know better than to just-”

“Oh, so now there’s my laundry? Then get your feet off my goddamn sofa-”

“Don’t start that fight with me right now Lee Minhyuk-”

“I’ll say whatever the fuck I want to-”

That was when Hyungwon choose to storm off and slam the door behind him, leaving behind an echoing silence that reverberated in the air.

Shaking hands pulled out a crushed box of stale cigarettes and an old lighter. Minhyuk hated the smell, so Hyungwon never smoked at home. But now he was trying his hardest to put distance between him and that cramped apartment.

Who gives a fuck, Hyungwon thought bitterly as he took a long drag. The smoke burned his throat and crept into his lungs. He exhaled heavily.

Even after years, they still had their hard days. Days that ended with Hyungwon smoking again or Minhyuk disappearing and drinking himself into a stupor.

Every infuriating detail about Lee Minhyuk ran through Hyungwon’s mind: his terrible habits, bad tempers, obnoxious whining, forgetful nature, clumsy limbs…He was on his third cigarette when his phone vibrated with a message.

 

_Are you still coming home tonight?_

 

Hyungwon left it on read for half an hour before responding.

 

_Yes._

 

(How could he ever answer otherwise?)

 

So when he saw Minhyuk shivering in front of their front door, clad in only thin pajamas, waiting for him to come home, every bit of anger and frustration evaporated.

“I’m sorry,” Minhyuk whispered, “I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean anything I said.”

“I know.”

 

_Let me be angry with you sometimes. But that won’t change anything.”_

 

 

/

 

 

“What about ten years later, when we’re both frustrated with our lives, sometimes wondering if we could have done better anyhow?”

“What are you on, asking all these. You have like zero faith in me, I swear.”

Minhyuk pouted, not getting a direct answer. Hyungwon snorted from where he was situated on the bed. He watched as Minhyuk flailed around in his oversized hoodie, struggling to find an explanation.

“That’s not true,” Minhyuk sighed. “I just worry, I guess.”

Hyungwon looped an arm around his boyfriend’s waist. “Stop worrying. You’re only eighteen and you have wrinkles already.”

Minhyuk gasped, scandalized. “You’re a horrible person, these aren’t wrinkles.”

“Yeah, whatever…ow!”

Minhyuk tackled him and they rolled around in mirth. Hyungwon received a few soft slaps to his chest before he pinned Minhyuk down by his wrists, breathless with laughter. He pressed their foreheads together and waited until he could feel their breathing in sync.

“Listen,” he said quietly. “Whatever you ask me, my answer will always be the same.

I love you, I want to be with you, I want to be where you are. Yes, I hate waking you up in the mornings because of your shitty temper but I also want to wake up beside you every morning. I know you’re worried about leaving home but I’ll be there with you. You aren’t getting rid of me that easily.”

Minhyuk gazed up at him with wide eyes sprinkled with warmth and adoration. He closed his eyes and pressed his lips to the corner of Hyungwon’s mouth.

“Okay,” he breathed. “I love you, too.”

 

 /

 

 

        _“Will you still find me in another lifetime, when all I give you is a fleeting glance in a crowd?”_

_“Yes. Always.”_

**Author's Note:**

> hi its me yes im actually alive  
> i wrote this in a moment of weakness and...well here it is. sry its kind of messy, i kind of lost where i wanted it to go so its ended hastily :( hope u still enjoy though!  
> sorry abt the slow updates, uni is a real handful and i didnt have time to write at all. like none  
> it was a really tough semester for me, still trying to get back on track   
> (hardly even used my computer last semester, all our hw had to be done by hand lol)  
> i promise the tailor au is still a thing!! but it has to wait until a longer vacation in order for me to like pick up where i left it  
> thank u for all the comments and kudos, i really appreciate them! they make my day srsly ;;  
> thank u all so much, if u want to talk to me (abt hyunghyuk), im on twitter  
> feel free to scream at me and if i dont reply immediately just assume im dead under a pile of sketches or something  
> THANK YALL AND PLS SUPPORT MX NEXT COMEBACK  
> STREAM THE SHIT OUT OF THE MV OK? OK  
> thanks for reading all this weirdness, peace out  
>  | [twitter](https://twitter.com/taemintylips)


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